Guys and gals,

[A note: Since Wikisposure editors seem to be a secretive bunch, I have no way to see how you 'work' and no other way to address you than as one entity which thinks alike. I will just address this entity directly as "you".

See also Addendum: analysis of the Wikisposure page]

It's already 14 months since you published a piece on me [mirror]. (Just when I was at a conference, preparing for a new busy job abroad. Nice timing!) I have not reacted to it so far, because I have had about a thousand better things to do than care about your piece of fiction. But since I have some time now, and you're nowadays keeping ranked at #2 of the English language Google results for 'Roderik Muit', I'll give a public response.

I want to thank you for proving my point, and for making me snicker. About your absolute lack of guts and brains, that is.

By 'proving my point' I mean this: five months before this, I published the most prominent (for the following year) English-language text on my website, that made the following point:

You have ignored that text, and based your ranting about me, purely on one seven year old text on an ancient website of mine, and referred to an e-mail from me to you (that you ofcourse left unanswered).

But even though you ignored my above text, boy, did you prove its point!

I am now left wondering about several things:

• Do you believe your own crap? I'm asking myself because every single sentence in your 'article' about me is either made up, or completely benign writing from me that you have had to twist and turn to make it appear negative. You have gone through some serious (conscious) word bending there; everyone who is smart enough to do some text analysis by themselves, can see that.
• What is it that makes you so eager to publish a page in which you could not come up with a single solid statement about why I am a bad person? If you see that you have nothing on me, do you really not stop and think 'hmm maybe this does not belong on Wikisposure'?
• If you're treating me like this (and I am not the only one1), then how seriously can I take the accusations you make about all the other 'pedophiles' you list?
• Do you not see that you are undermining your position of legitimacy as an 'informational resource'? Or do you not care? Or... are you fully aware that you were never one to begin with?
• Do all Perverted Justice's projects show this level of stupidity? And if so: why do people give you so much credit? Really, does all of the USA value 'scandal' higher than 'truth'?

I have to tell you, I am somewhat disappointed. Like I said, I had already published a text saying "vocal 'anti pedo' people are clueless losers", which is true in the Netherlands... But people have warned me over and over again about how dangerous Perverted Justice is. You guys have been connected to a TV show, I thought you were well funded and well organised. And then I get this!? I mean, come on, guys. If you are going to ignore half the truth about me and distort the other half, you could at least do it a little less obviously... And throw in a real accusation or two, because otherwise 'the public' will wonder why you published this in the first place.

What was the intent of this page anyway?

I hear you are into the business of 'scaring [real] predators into hiding'. And let's assume for a moment that you actually consider me a danger, against all evidence. (Because otherwise I really don't know why you published this.) Did you think you could bully me into submission by saying I'm a dangerous pedophile?

Well guess again. I ain't scared. And here's why.

First of all, I am already open about myself (as you are well aware) so your page does not add a lot of new information. You do not 'expose' me.

Secondly, I have real contact with real people. (And yes, that includes kids and their parents.) If you would have thought better about how open I am and read up more about me, you would know this. So how do you think these people are going to react? Are they going to value opinions from a bunch of bigots on another continent, over the information they can get from an open, honest, approachable person (i.e. me)? No way.

Let me repeat that for you in a way that you will love. Your 'exposure' does not keep me away from kids. I have no less contact with kids than I had before you published your shit.

Thirdly and most importantly: I am not going to let you bully or scare me, because I consider that a matter of principle.

Yes, you are doing damage to me. I will give you that credit. People who don't know me, like prospective clients/employers, are being more evasive. You have a negative effect on my source of income.

But what do you think that was going to do? Make me jump through every possible hoop to get links between my name and pedophilia removed from your site, Google, etc? Many people expect I want to do that, but I don't. Reasoning with you is obviously out of the question - and attacking you or threatening legal action would just play right into your hand. I bet you would just get off on planning actions against me on your private forums and 'fighting' me. But I already mentioned why I am not going that road, in my previous unanswered mail to you:

So the only way for me to go forward and hopefully neutralize part of the damage you are doing to me, is to get more open about it and beat my own drum. I don't consider my attraction to kids a big deal anymore. I don't need to talk about it. But it's obviously not a big hidden secret, and if I need to bring it up in the process of outlining what a bunch of useless liars you are, then fine.

Gloves off.

Yes, I am calling you liars. What you are doing is plain libel. You have nothing at all to support your conclusion "The bottom line is that he is a selfish pedophile who is attracted to children, and doesn't care about anyone else's feelings. In other words, the delusions he is under are just as dangerous as any other pedophile.". Not even in your own article, because it is plain to see how you had to twist words out of shape to reach that conclusion. You made this up with the single purpose to defame me and my reputation.

I don't mind people who know me, calling me a 'pedophile' because they know what they mean with it and how to use the word. To you, however, who try to paint all feelings of attraction as a danger, I am not a pedophile. Why? Because I have proven for the last fifteen years that I am no 'danger'. There is no twisting of words you can ever do, to make that untrue. I don't fit into the picture you're constantly painting for pedophiles, at all, and there's plenty of proof for that around -- so then just don't call me one.

I have had friendships with kids over these years, because I like kids and they like me. I know their parents. They have always been able to see and judge my behaviour, and tell me if they think I'm doing something wrong. (Which they have never felt the need to do.)

Yes, I do have sexual feelings for children. And I don't beat myself up about it anymore. I accept them and I know how to deal with them; after more than fifteen years of experience, that's pretty safe to say. I don't always tell everyone about my attraction to kids because... it is not necessary, because in practice it is never an issue. Most of the parents of children who have been (or are) my friends, however, have heard about my feelings (directly from me or otherwise). That can get pretty scary. But after the first scare, none of them have so far felt the need to keep their kids away from me. Some parents have made me promise things (to ease their concerns) and I did; I'm fine with that.

Maybe you don't believe this. Because you like to believe in the fairy tale that all men who are sexually attracted to kids are a time bomb of hormones waiting to explode, and people should hide their kids from them at all time. Well, I tell you: it is nonsense. With people like me, who have accepted their feelings for what they are and are open to parents' comments, and don't try to be secretive about their interactions with kids... what do you expect is going to happen? "I have been friends with these kids for a few years, we're close and everyone could see what was going on and check if I wasn't 'grooming' them or whatever... and suddenly I raped him, it just happened in a flash, I couldn't help it"? That's hilarious. You don't really believe that, do you? I give parents and kids the room to make up their minds about what is appropriate behaviour, and it works itself out. It doesn't go beyond "oh, you don't want that hand on your shoulder? (Maybe because your parents told you I shouldn't?) OK, sorry, now I know. Fine." And that's that. I couldn't have said it better than one dad did, who I personally told I was a 'pedophile', after his 11-year-old son had been hanging around my house for a few years:

See? It's not exactly fun to hear that the guy your son hangs out with, is a 'pedo'. But when the 'pedo' in question is approachable about it and you as a parent have some self confidence and a good bond with your kids, then there is no reason to panic. Parents around me can do whatever they want, and they apparently don't panic.

Of course people like you don't want to hear that. People like you want to make something that can be handled sensibly, into a big scary problem because then you can wage war against it.

Well I'll tell you here: I am proud that I have learned to live with my feelings in a constructive way, so that I know they're not a danger. I am proud that I can 'act normal about them' to a level that gives parents some confidence to deal with the issue 'normally' - despite the fact that I've grown up in a world where you and everybody else only seems to want to spread panic, and tell everyone I am a dangerous ticking time bomb. In a world whose single purpose sometimes seems to isolate people like me and create problems, I am proud to have personally grown to a point where I can actively step back into society and show them that the problem with me is just a myth. Thereby making the lives of kids and parents easier, despite the fact that every other 'vocal' person seems to want to make them harder.

I know how to overcome useless fear of yourself. I know personal growth. I've also met quite some other good willing 'pedophiles' online who face the same things. I've noticed how good it is for them to find each other and discuss these things. I have seen how people learn from each other and be more self confident in living a good life - something that noone has ever taught them. I have seen how in some groups of people, 'ethics' form, just by being able for once, to discuss the issues surrounding their feelings of attraction with others.

So, yes. I am involved in hosting 'pedophile websites', if you want to call them that. Once again, I'm proud of it. I know the good they can do in this world. In your 'investigation' of WHOIS records, you have seen that I am not hiding it either, so if something illegal were happening there, I would always be traceable to account for it.

And a substantial part of the world understands this. They don't have to rally in public support of me (and most people are afraid of being associated with it because of war mongerers like you), but they do understand and respect it.

I am one of the owners of 'pedofilie.nl', a website that does not get the maintenance that it really deserves, because we're a team of volunteers with busy lives... but still serves a purpose. It is the only place where people can visit with certain kinds of questions. This place is visited and respected by pedophiles, people who think they might be pedophiles (even as young as 18, because the world tells them it is wrong to love a 15 year old girl), parents of victims, worried bystanders of things happening in their neighbourhoods, students with thesis questions, and journalists.

We're considered a resource. The only one making noise about the website was some loony woman named Yvonne van Hertum with her anti-pedo-'organisation', as I was trying to tell you in my e-mail. (Who has, by the way, been sentenced to 4 months prison by the court of appeals in some libel case, earlier this year.)

And you can simply know all this by doing some search work on the 'net, before putting some stupid libelous page online to 'expose' me. I have even documented this on the other webpage I mentioned, which you must have read (and ignored) because its intro was on the front page of my website.

Care to read the conclusion again with me?

So. Am I going to back down to some libelous Wikisposure page that is obviously not meant to 'neutralize any danger' but just to damage me? I think not. It's a matter of principle; the world would be worse off if I did. Morons like you who are void of content, should not be handed that kind of power in public debate.

I know for a fact, from personal acquaintances, that you have destroyed lives of some good people whose only crime was to come into this world with feelings of attractions which are hard to deal with, and which they were learning how to deal with and get a normal life on forums where you tracked them down and 'exposed' them. When they had committed no crime and weren't going to.

So Fuck you, I'm a survivor.

And please oh please. If you want to be taken anywhere near seriously, at least show people that you can read. For fourteen months now, the top of your page about me has the title 'Roderik Muit' and the top right says 'Robert Muit'. That's the first time anyone has named me Robert. Talk about braindead.

[ update: One day after I wrote this, they turned out to be even more braindead. Maybe it's bad of me/useless, but I just couldn't resist ridiculing them for it... ]

• 1. I've spotted a page about my personal friend Pimme. Almost every one of the quotes you put on the page says that he would never act on his sexual attraction for good reasons. So why is he on Wikisposure again? Seriously, if this is the kind of "pushing pedophile propaganda" that you are accusing him of, then why don't you encourage this 'propaganda' instead of making him into an enemy?